My daddy used to always tell me when I was a younger that my problem is that I don’t listen…LOL… but he was wrong. I listen. Trust me, I listen. I listen because I’m always curious to hear what people think and perceive is going in my life; especially when it comes to my relationships. This is the reason most people including myself ask “what do you think…?” or “do you think he’s good for me…?” And what ends up happening with me, is the same thing that happens with most people: Nothing…LMAO… I still end up doing what I want to do in the end. Now, I’m not saying that I’ve never taken any advice. I take lots of advice on certain things but very seldom do I take it about my relationships. Because if I did I wouldn’t be with my best friend now. Our shit is not perfect by no means but its ours and it’s good. And trust me when I tell you I went through a lot to get here and it’s going to take much than a lot to give it up…LOL…
So, I’ve been told that it takes a certain type of man to deal with me…LOL… because as nice and as good a woman I am, I’m equally as what some would call crazy but I like to call it: Spirited… LMAO…One of my good friends likes to say that some of us women are an “acquired taste,” and I guess you can say that I’m one of those women… SMH… I’m a good person. But I like my way…LOL… but what woman doesn’t? I just assumed that all women want their way but I was told by a few women, that apparently there are some women who aren’t like me, not as forward about what they want like me. And I can honestly say, I have NO friends like that… ALL of US are selfish bitches when it comes to our men and gettin our way! LOL…
I stopped bullshitting myself and with others a long time ago. It just takes way too much energy to be putting on multiple faces. I am who I am and I love who I love and I make NO apologies for it; simple as that. I like to consider myself a little smart, kinda funny, and most of all: true to myself. I don’t make excuses for anything I’ve done or for what I’m doing…because this is what I’m choosing to do, so in other words, this is simply what I’m doing.
I love to hear people’s opinions about my relationships because I find the perceptions of others interesting. Because it’s really eye opening to hear what people think is going on with you, your life, and your relationship. Some even have opinions on what you should be doing or how you could be doing something different if not more. But see I’ve stopped taking relationship advice a long time ago too…LOL… thank you for the advice but I think I’m going to do this my way, no matter how crazy it may seem to the outside world. Once you learn to make your own decisions and form your own opinions about your life, there’s no better feeling. When you can truly not give a fuck about what people think about you, life gets that much easier.
Men fuck up, people fuck up, so I’m big on giving second, third, fourth, and sometimes a fifth chances but at some point, in every relationship, you have to just cut a mutha-fucka off: Plain and simple. Because from my experiences with men, what I find that ends up happening is, that they stop believing your threats and promises to leave; leaving you no other choice but to do just that; LEAVE. But the decision to leave one’s relationship is something that has to be done when you’re ready. Your friends and loved ones can tell you they think you should leave but only you really know when it’s time to walk out that door… and never look back. I’ve been in enough RELATIONSHIPS and SITUATIONSHIPS…LOL… to have the ability to know who and what ain’t good for me. So, thank you but no thank you…your opinion simply ain’t needed!
When people give opinions on my relationships they are largely based off of two things. One, their perceptions of what they think they see and we know how that saying goes “believe half of what you hear and none of what you see.” Secondly, they base their opinions off of the information I tell them; and the problem with that is, no one ever tells EVERYTHING that goes on in their relationship. The real problem with that is because us as women, seem to only share shit with our friends when shit is going wrong; never when our shit is right! And this is something we as women must work on! So what ends up happening is, no one in your inner circle of friends likes him…LOL…even if y’all fix y’all problems your friends will always look at him in a negative light. And that ladies is: YOUR fault.
So, women if you don’t want your relationship under complete scrutiny, learn to keep certain shit to yourself. If the nigga don’t come home one night and you KNOW you ain’t leaving him for real; keep it to yourself…LOL… your girls don’t need to know every time he come in late…LOL…you know what you do: HANDLE THAT SHIT! See, men don’t share with their homeboys the way we share with our girlfriends and why is that?? Because for them, it’s no one’s fucking business what goes on in their relationships…LOL… Ladies, might be time for us it’s time to follow-suit… Love your girls, confide in your girls, but remember you are in LOVE with that man and that leaving is never as easy as it sounds and it may not be what’s right for you but what is right for her.
Urbanista Diva